Chapter 567 - When My Fear Becomes My Experience

 Yesterday's Coles order was the second for which their "Little Books" collection was available and with yesterday's I bought the box in which to mount the books. She remembered I had said the new ones had arrived, I had forgotten, so after helping her unwrap the box of its cellophane I left her sort and slot away the books. I doubt she will read any. The type of activity in which she is content to immerse all her attention, as evidenced by her sorting the CD and DVD collections again, although that was initiated by my finding a spiritual song CD left in the player for which the cover can't be found.

The past week was one at our new normal status in our ever changing downhill slide. Except for yesterday, a step change. I will just type my notes for Saturday 8th of May.

0600 Mild continuous dyskinesia, 2.8 night rate to 7.0 day rate, morning dose 1.0. Has been on right side, legs pulled up,  continued, remains asleep. Rolled her onto left side, eyes opened, no comprehension, I straightened her legs, rubbing her upper leg and arm until dyskinesia stopped and seems asleep.

0630 Remains asleep.

0730 Vigorous dyskinesia had started some time earlier, unable to wake her, seems in a "zombie" state. Eyes open, staring, irises large. Gave a Bolus of 2.0 from the pump. I sat her upright on the bed then slid her onto the commode and removed the FitBit from her right leg. Then into the bathroom, removed her incontinence pants with some difficulty. Dyskinesia continued, she remained unresponsive, not answering questions, eyes open, irises big.

0735 Dyskinesia slowing, no response to questions, sitting upright on commode.

0740 Eyes open, has done some piddle in the pot, has not spoken yet, dyskinesia continues, eyes closed.

0750 Eyes open again, hands move, not responding to questions.

0810 Wild dog carer helped me get her back into bed, new incontinence pants on, not responsive, laying on back.

0820 Still asleep, replaced the cassette, flushed the side port and cleaned the stoma.

0830 Has been quite still but now beginning to move her head a little. Unresponsive.

0910 No dyskinesia, maybe waking, moves head slightly, not responsive to my voice.

0935 Awake, no dyskinesia, speaks to me. Irises small.

0945 Under shower seated on commode

1015 Dressed her then transferred to wheelchair. Normal breakfast of fruit juice with Benefiber, diced fruit, a crumpet with melted cheese.

Then followed a "normal" day. During the events described above her breathing was normal, not gasping, fast or shallow. Her temperature (Wild Dog carers check during every visit) was normal.

During this past week she has shown less interest in things, perhaps more reserved than usual, continues to pick up bits on the floor ( I should sweep more often), is often found trying to remove small threads caught in the wheels of the wheelchair (sometimes they are there) and what she perceives as marks on the floor.

The episode described above is the longest of the periods when she has been unresponsive. I had told the Wild Dog carer, who volunteered to return later that morning, after helping me get her back to bed that I would call the ambulance if she was in the same condition by 10AM. I only now remember that I didn't think to take her blood pressure, pulse or use the oximeter that arrived last week (a toy, bought in case of COVID infection).