Chapter 483 - Some Experiments are Successful
Beginning on Tuesday 13th February her stoma became infected. Prior to that there was redness where the sticky tape had been. Wiping with a cotton bud and saline each morning has removed the colour and slight discharge so that today the stoma is now clear. I often fail to remember to wipe the stoma area with a cotton bud after she showers. I applied Dermaid 1% to the redness where the tape had been and also to a red spot that appeared several cms away from the stoma.
With her guidance I completed shortening the legs on several pairs of my trousers. Nothing fancy, just turned up the cuffs, a row of stitching then cut off the excess. She is no longer able to do complete such a simple task.
The Saturday before we left on our holiday my left ear became completely deaf. By the time we returned, having used a whole bottle of Waxol in it, our doctor diagnosed an inner ear problem, recommended allowing a fortnight before serious treatment, and last Saturday the ear suddenly came good again, as well as that ear can. One afternoon in the motel in Border City after I had placed her on the toilet I needed to sit in her wheel chair for a considerable time, I was disoriented and had to grasp furniture to stay upright, then after I helped her off the toilet I vomited. Our doctor later said this was due to my inner ear problem.
We drove to Border City on Tuesday 20th February, returning the following Tuesday. At several rest stops along the 4 lane the locks on the disabled toilets were broken; no need for my MLAK key. Since buying that key in 2002 I think I needed to use it once; the key a good idea not respected by those needing the facility of a disabled toilet but lacking a key.
We stayed at the multi-story motel at the western end of the main street. The only real problem with the slightly cramped room was a step from the carpeted passage way into the bathroom. Rented equipment was already in the room; an adjustable bed, a commode/shower chair and a transporter (a somewhat smaller version of our Sara Stedy at home); each worked reasonably well as equipment for hire.
So for six days in Border City I did not drive the car anywhere. Each day we walked the main street, having "brunch" at coffee shops or the Club next door to the motel. Good exercise for me pushing her portable wheel chair and the weather was fine. Several times we used room service for an evening meal (although I had to collect the meal tray myself from the restaurant), otherwise at the Club. I had promised not to visit relatives; didn't even phone an old school mate because I was unable to find his number. A couple barged in upon us in the disabled toilet in the park half way up the main street; again a busted MLAK lock. I gave her free reign to push herself around the shop of a clothing chain she once frequented while I sat outside reading a good book. I was called in to carry some of the items she intended to buy; such were slipping from her lap. The total came to $315. Apart from that expense only few useless things were bought at junk shops. I visited an optometrist shop to have my glasses repaired for free; the frame had been warped and a screw had fallen out. One morning we spent a short time in the Botanical Gardens; in a disappointing state compared to my childhood memories. While there she "trimmed" a climbing rose in an arbour; there were straggly branches with rose hips at the ends. She collected quite a large bunch until I convinced her the gardeners would be upset to see her leaving with the bunch in her hand, so I removed the rose hips which she wished to take home to plant, hoping for roses to grow from the seeds.
Back when I hoped to organise a fortnight of respite at a nursing home for her, her sisters had volunteered to stay with her but only for a week. I had decided that I would not go way during that time. Their commitments then reduced the period to several days once we returned from Border City. That was OK, a chance to discover how well they cared for her and how well the three of them got along together. I was quite pleased how matters were going (except on Friday night during a discussion about gay marriage etc etc when there was an angry outburst from the younger that heterosexual marriages were decreed by God and I replied that marriage was the transfer of property rights in paternalistic societies of females; I suppose I asked for it) until Saturday morning when I walked in on an angry rant that my PWP should be grateful to have someone to look after her; I think my PWP voiced her concern that should I go off on respite that I won't come back. I took fright, my PWP was beginning to cry, her sister was becoming belligerent, I left them to it and began cutting up the cardboard boxes my PWP's incontinence supplies were delivered in, to place in the recycling bin. I was joined by the middle sister who helped pack box pieces in the bin. A suitable way of passing the time. From inside the house ranting continued for awhile then came apologies. That afternoon after we saw them off at the railway station I asked her what the the incident had been about; she was unsure, thought the anger was something to do with a son who has no support at all. She did not understand. The outburst confused her. After we returned home she began pulling the craft and quilting magazines off the shelves in the back room; she wished to throw them into the garbage, the reason being she was unable to sew any more, she had no need of them. Was this the result of the outburst upon her in the morning? Perhaps not, I suspect she has been thinking this way each time she fails at doing that which she was once very competent.
So one experiment worked, the other failed, an example that anger does not work but in this instance she is the one to suffer. Anger only induces confusion and stress and may I remember that well. Now to plan for another trip away.
With her guidance I completed shortening the legs on several pairs of my trousers. Nothing fancy, just turned up the cuffs, a row of stitching then cut off the excess. She is no longer able to do complete such a simple task.
The Saturday before we left on our holiday my left ear became completely deaf. By the time we returned, having used a whole bottle of Waxol in it, our doctor diagnosed an inner ear problem, recommended allowing a fortnight before serious treatment, and last Saturday the ear suddenly came good again, as well as that ear can. One afternoon in the motel in Border City after I had placed her on the toilet I needed to sit in her wheel chair for a considerable time, I was disoriented and had to grasp furniture to stay upright, then after I helped her off the toilet I vomited. Our doctor later said this was due to my inner ear problem.
We drove to Border City on Tuesday 20th February, returning the following Tuesday. At several rest stops along the 4 lane the locks on the disabled toilets were broken; no need for my MLAK key. Since buying that key in 2002 I think I needed to use it once; the key a good idea not respected by those needing the facility of a disabled toilet but lacking a key.
We stayed at the multi-story motel at the western end of the main street. The only real problem with the slightly cramped room was a step from the carpeted passage way into the bathroom. Rented equipment was already in the room; an adjustable bed, a commode/shower chair and a transporter (a somewhat smaller version of our Sara Stedy at home); each worked reasonably well as equipment for hire.
So for six days in Border City I did not drive the car anywhere. Each day we walked the main street, having "brunch" at coffee shops or the Club next door to the motel. Good exercise for me pushing her portable wheel chair and the weather was fine. Several times we used room service for an evening meal (although I had to collect the meal tray myself from the restaurant), otherwise at the Club. I had promised not to visit relatives; didn't even phone an old school mate because I was unable to find his number. A couple barged in upon us in the disabled toilet in the park half way up the main street; again a busted MLAK lock. I gave her free reign to push herself around the shop of a clothing chain she once frequented while I sat outside reading a good book. I was called in to carry some of the items she intended to buy; such were slipping from her lap. The total came to $315. Apart from that expense only few useless things were bought at junk shops. I visited an optometrist shop to have my glasses repaired for free; the frame had been warped and a screw had fallen out. One morning we spent a short time in the Botanical Gardens; in a disappointing state compared to my childhood memories. While there she "trimmed" a climbing rose in an arbour; there were straggly branches with rose hips at the ends. She collected quite a large bunch until I convinced her the gardeners would be upset to see her leaving with the bunch in her hand, so I removed the rose hips which she wished to take home to plant, hoping for roses to grow from the seeds.
Back when I hoped to organise a fortnight of respite at a nursing home for her, her sisters had volunteered to stay with her but only for a week. I had decided that I would not go way during that time. Their commitments then reduced the period to several days once we returned from Border City. That was OK, a chance to discover how well they cared for her and how well the three of them got along together. I was quite pleased how matters were going (except on Friday night during a discussion about gay marriage etc etc when there was an angry outburst from the younger that heterosexual marriages were decreed by God and I replied that marriage was the transfer of property rights in paternalistic societies of females; I suppose I asked for it) until Saturday morning when I walked in on an angry rant that my PWP should be grateful to have someone to look after her; I think my PWP voiced her concern that should I go off on respite that I won't come back. I took fright, my PWP was beginning to cry, her sister was becoming belligerent, I left them to it and began cutting up the cardboard boxes my PWP's incontinence supplies were delivered in, to place in the recycling bin. I was joined by the middle sister who helped pack box pieces in the bin. A suitable way of passing the time. From inside the house ranting continued for awhile then came apologies. That afternoon after we saw them off at the railway station I asked her what the the incident had been about; she was unsure, thought the anger was something to do with a son who has no support at all. She did not understand. The outburst confused her. After we returned home she began pulling the craft and quilting magazines off the shelves in the back room; she wished to throw them into the garbage, the reason being she was unable to sew any more, she had no need of them. Was this the result of the outburst upon her in the morning? Perhaps not, I suspect she has been thinking this way each time she fails at doing that which she was once very competent.
So one experiment worked, the other failed, an example that anger does not work but in this instance she is the one to suffer. Anger only induces confusion and stress and may I remember that well. Now to plan for another trip away.
posted by Kilpike | 11:32 am
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